I am not sure what to put I miss my brother.I wonder why him and what was the reason? Really it sucks I wish I had a better relationship with.He is what America is all about Home of the Brave...and he truly was

My Brother

Yesterday I found out my brother Kimble passed away.I already miss him.I am in shock that he is gone.I am mad at the situation my family is in.He died fighting to keep our country safe he and another brave soildier lost his life.I love him forever.

RASCAL FLATTS

So my mother in law offered to pay for us to go with her and her boyfriend to go see Rascal Flatts.My hubby's awesome aunt and soon to be uncle will watch the kids....the only downfall we leave the morning of the 30th which means the boys miss Halloween at school.....does that make me a bad mom? But even after all of that I still get to see my FAVORITE GROUP EVER!!!!!!!

Sometimes I feel left out for whatever reason...........Maybe I annoy certain people or maybe I just forget to be invited who knows...but sometimes I feel left out.

Autumn 2009

We did the pumpkin patch thing and I got some great pictures.So I am going to use them as my kids pics which I never go and pay to get.I guess this is photography on a budget....but I think they are pretty good wish I had a better camera.Anyways here are the newest pics and as you can see all is well in the family.I am babysitting and Greg has a job which he hates so life is good!

Pregnancy and Infant Loss Day

It is nice to know that somewhere some recognized the need for this.I am truly thankful for he people that went ahead of me in my loss and made my experience a little easier.My grandma had a loss and she never even knew what the baby was.So to all who have or will ever have this horrible loss I think of you today.

I Belong to the Church........

Of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints...I know who I am I know Gods plan I follow him in faith.I believe in the Savior Jesus Christ I honor his name.I do what is right I follow his light his truth I will proclaim.........................
So I have never actually said I am LDS on my blog but I am and PROUD of it.I know that the LDS church is true with my whole heart.I struggled for many years wondering if it was.I can say without a shadow of a doubt that Joseph Smith is a true prophet of God and that he was sent to earth to restore the gospel and on Earth.I feel so blessed to be able to express my love of my church everyday.For a very long time I felt so lost and when I went back to church I figured out the missing piece was Heavenly Father and his love in my life.Things aren't always easy but by putting my faith in the Lord I have been blessed ten million times over.

I am thankful that I am able to have the blessings of seeing my family grow and learn every week.Whether you believe my church is right or wrong you have to admit we are very for our families....and I am so grateful for my kids and hubby.

My husband isn't a member of my church in fact he never even goes with me.I am ok with that he is happy living his life that way.I hope that by my example he will find his way to what he feels is true.Whether that is mu church or something different.I know I am blessed with so much I see it everyday especially with my health and the bills that in cure from them.I love Heavenly Father and feel his love for me and that is enough for me.

Moms

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Living Dead in Dallas

So I read the second book in the series and I have to say I am enjoying the series as each book goes on.In this book we find out a little more about the vamps and how they can be.We also learn more about how society looks at the vamps.It reminds me a lot of how "normal" people can be so prejudice against people who aren't "normal".I really enjoyed the second book.The only down part was there is a Vamp that is a molester and serial killer and a almost rape scene.So if you have a hard time reading anything with sexual content DO NOT READ THESE BOOKS!!!! I overall like the series so far and would recommend them to people with my warning.I still love Sookie and think she is a awesome character.

Bradly my full story.....if you havent read it yet.

Bradly Michael Campbell
I found out I was pregnant with our third child on July 25th 2004.The reason I remember was because my family was having a huge family reunion. I was on my way out of town with my boys, Trentyn who was 3 and Hunter who was just barely 1, and Greg my husband. I was so excited I had to call my mom and she was excited too.

As the weeks rolled on, everything was going well. I felt fine besides normal everyday pregnancy woes. I went in to my first doctor appointment and found out I wasn't 10 weeks along like I thought, but only 6 weeks. Looking back I am happy I got a month back. By 16 weeks I found out we were having our third boy and we decided his name would be Bradly Michael (Michael is after Greg's dad).

Right after I had Hunter I found out I had gallstones, and I began having issues again. By 19 weeks I was really having a hard time, so I went into my OB and he said that I could have my gallbladder removed. I hesitated to do it because I was worried something bad might happen, but I went ahead and had the surgery. The surgeon said all was well and as a 21 year old I believed him. I had no reason not to. I was supposed to feel better after a week, but instead I went downhill. The surgeon told me I was fine, that it was probably gas. Bradly seemed to be doing fine. I felt him kicking more and more. I just got sicker but I never thought it was that bad. I was so sick that I couldn't even sleep in my own bed because I hurt so badly. I finally had my OB appointment on December 5th. My OB walked in and saw how yellow I was and ordered lab work immediately. Turns out my surgeon had nicked my common bile duct. I had bile everywhere in my body besides where Bradly was. By Friday I was sent to Medford (3 hours from my home). My mom flew in from Utah to be with me. When she saw me, I was so bloated she said I looked like I was 9 months pregnant.

I was admitted to the hospital. The doctors were worried about the baby. I was too. The first day we were there my mom walked into my room and all of the sudden she saw my stomach move from a huge kick. That is one of my favorite memories of Bradly because to me it meant he was fine. The gastroenterologist did a procedure and fixed the hole. I also had to have 8 liters of bile removed from my body. My mom went home after several days since we thought I was getting better and would be able to leave on Tuesday the 14th or Wednesday the 15th. Well that didn't happen. I didn't get home until January 15th.

The night I had Bradly was a normal day from what I can remember. I was sleeping off and on and Greg was with me (he had been laid off from his job a few months earlier). All of the sudden I heard this popping sound like a water balloon. It was so loud that it woke Greg up. I figured that it was my catheter that had somehow popped out. I called the nurse, who came in to look and told me that I was in labor and that my water had broken. From then on it was a whirlwind.

I wasn't in the maternity ward so they had to call a code blue and 20 minutes later at 12:58 a.m. on December 15, 2004, Bradly was born. He weighed 1 pound 9 ounces and was 13 1/2 inches long, born at 24 ½ weeks gestation. He was born alive and I thought he looked just like my oldest son. I vividly remember looking at Greg and knowing that this wasn't good. It happened so fast that Greg was across the room. He couldn't even comfort me. I told him to go with Bradly and I would be fine.

The night went by and I have no memory of it. I am not sure if it was shock or grief, but I just can't remember details. Greg called his mom and stepdad, and they came right over. My mother in law stayed with me and Greg's stepdad went with him. Sometime during the night I was told that Bradly's lungs were so underdeveloped that the tubes in his lungs came out and they almost lost him, but they were able to save him so that I could see him.

The next morning the doctors who were taking care of Bradly came in and gave us the worst news a parent ever has to hear. They said that because my water broke so early, Bradly ended up getting my infection, which in turn gave him a brain bleed. They said even if he made it he would be severely handicapped and would probably only live until he was 2 or 3. Also he was only holding his oxygen saturations at 75% and he was already trying to go. I knew in my heart what we had to do I couldn't prolong his life knowing he was in pain and would probably die anyway.

They moved us down to a room near the NICU and they brought him to me at 1:00pm.They asked if we wanted to have him on the tubes or without. We said without. They brought him in and he was so small and bruised (although I didn't see it) and his eyes were still fused shut. Not being able to see his eyes was so hard. I did pretty good holding him until they said I should put him on my bare chest. I did that and I lost it completely. I just couldn't believe this was happening to me. My boys never saw Bradly because they were with family hours away from us. I held Bradly as he took his last breaths. He passed at 1:32 p.m. I was so sad, but in my heart I knew he was safe and not in any pain anymore. Greg's mom and two aunts were in the room with us. I asked Greg if he wanted to hold Bradly after he passed. Greg said no at first but then after his mom held Bradly, he took him too. I have a vivid memory of this and I know if Greg hadn't held him he would have regretted it. We spent a little more time with him. His color was getting bad. I held him one more time and gave him so many kisses. My biggest fear was that he wouldn't know me. The nurses took him back to the NICU and did a cast of his hand and foot. I keep those in my window to remind me of him.

He was buried on December 31st. The funeral home waited to bury him hoping I would be able to go. Greg's dad and uncle arranged the whole thing. I am thankful for his dad taking over because I know Greg and I couldn't have done it. I missed his burial by a week. I am still sad to this day I wasn't there.

I ended up having to have major surgery on December 24th. They had to clean the rest of my body out. In all I had 22 pounds of bile in my body and a broken heart. After a long road to recovery, I was blessed to know that I was lucky enough to have a special little person in my life for 12 and half hours. We just added to our family in September 2007, a little girl named Lora. I know that I will see Bradly again and I know he watches out for his family. Without my loss I wouldn't be the person I am today.

Dead until Dark

I finished the book yesterday all 292 pages so here is my review:





So the book is ok, at the beginning it was very slow. I honestly enjoyed the book once it got going (more as it hit the middle of the book).The story is pretty easy to follow except when it skips ahead before I was ready for it.Sometimes she sorta hinted at stuff but then kinda leaving you with a "wait what just happened".The whole Vampire thing is a little boring to me I like Sookie the best, she is a character I can relate to.I also want her to end up with Sam..although I am sure that isn't who she is going to be with. The only thing I really have a issue with is the Vamps can only come out at night. The fact that they sleep in the ground bugs me.I like that they are mainstream and known about though...that makes it more interesting.I would rather they be like another Vamp book and be able to be out all the time and never have to sleep.Anyways you should read it at least to see what the hype is about and let me know what you think.

Sookie Stackhouse Books

So I'm curious about the whole show True Blood.So I am going to read the books...after each book I am going to give a over view of what I think...stay tuned

Sounds like Life to me

So I was doing so well...I had a bunch of energy back and was busy with my crazy life.Then last Sunday hits and I am feeling sick again.I went to the ER on Tuesday after two days of hell to find out that they want to keep the stinkin stent in for another 3 weeks.The bonus is I am loosing weight so fast because I can barely eat! I am down 10 pounds,So instead of complaining I am going to post a picture of my beautiful kids.

Getting prepared

So after a lot of thinking and praying I want to go to the temple.It is time to start getting prepared for me to go.Yes Greg is ok with it I have talked to him and although he doesnt completly understand he said he was fine with it. I am ready to get prepared to go.....I am just excited to be worthy to go to the temple!

Kids say the darndest things!

So today I walked past the boys room and saw Hunter playing with his little pee pee.I told him not to play with it because heavenly father doesn't like it.I then go out to Greg and ask him what to say to him.He says tell him it will fall off if he plays with it.So I go back in his room and tell him that.He looks at me for a few and then says mom did you play with your pee pee when you were little and is that why yours feel off? I laughed so hard and told him no.He says the funniest things to me...love him so much

New blog background

Decided it was time for a update on my blog what do you think? I love it.....

I am truly humbled

After I wrote my last post I found a interesting blog.The blog is about a lady who was in a plane crash and now is living her life with severe burns.As I read the blog I thought to myself wow things could be worse and how would I deal with it.I am now a little more humble and thankful to my Heavenly Father for the things I do have.If I have to have more medical bills I will just have to deal with it because when it comes right down to it I would rather spend everyday with my family then never again. My life experiences are only what I can handle and I know I can handle each and everything life is thrown at me with love patience and a desire to not dwell on things I can't change.Plus the loving guide of my Heavenly Father I will be ok. I am so thankful for my little family.I am truly blessed to have my beautiful little girl who probably wasn't medically supposed to be here but Heavenly Father knew better and blessed my body to be healthy enough to have her.I am truly blessed and need to remember that everyday.

I HATE DOCOTORS!!!!!!!!

I HATE Dr.s especially Dr Larson whom practise in Coos Bay OR.He has made my life hell for far to long.I am tired of being sick because he screwed up.I feel helpless because I feel like I have no way to get him to realize what he did to me. To make matters worse I owe at least 21,000 dollars in medical bills which of course I cannot pay due to the fact that I don't work and probably cant work for awhile.I am dealing with all this crap of Dr's and my hubby is barely making enough for us to get by.I cant get insured for any of this because oh yeah stupid pre existing condition. I also have to get a tooth pulled and that is going to cost me money I really don't have(yes the tooth thing is my fault.) GRRRRR can life be any worse on the money front????

Summer 2009 pics(yes sorry it has taken me so long)

Summer has been so much fun snd yet crazy and hard. The summer began and with Greg making the decsion to not go to Texas any more.Life has been a struggle trying to find a job and living.We have been going and going to parks and swimming having my little sister visit, hanging t with friends. Then in August I had a little minor stint(no pun intended) where I had to be hospitalized for 3 days to have a stint put in my common bile duct.(whole backstory on Angelbabies website) Anyways I had to be there and we have no insurance so needless to say we are broke and now in a huge amount of debt but atleast I am alive and not in there for a month.I am recovering very well.The boys start school soon Trent 3rd Hunter 1st(cant believe it) Lora turns two next month and I keep windering how they grow so fast(slow down) So that is a update of my summer and here are a ton of pics form the summer.Oh and I chopped 8-9 inches off my hair.

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